Gonna pop in this last one! A 2011 Timeline!

Seeing as we have 2 days left of the year 2011, I kinda wanted to pop in this one post. This year has been a year of firsts. Of course, you can say that about any year that you've lived, but this one has the most BIG firsts. I guess I just kinda wanna list them out...Mostly for me to see and look back on. So, here it is. 2011 in a (kinda long) nutshell.

-First time I camped out for a parade with a bunch of my friends in the freezing cold!
-First serious bf in California
-First actual movie date (OK, so my parents didn't quite know...)
-First time over at a bfs house that was allowed by parents! (It was truly a miracle)
-First time Vile Day (I mean Valentine's sorry) wasn't a complete disaster!
-First bouquet of roses ever sent to my house
-First time I went to a trip without my parents for a long time. (Colorado with my brother for two weeks)
-First time in -30 degree weather (Horrible, just horrible)
-First camping trip
-First time I've cried in front of strangers..or at least people I'd only known for like a week.
-First time I made legit friends through my school haha
-First time at the Kid's Choice Awards
-First time in the SAME ROOM as Johnny Depp!
-First completely awkward encounter with ex-bf in acting class with suspected new gf (Let's just say, it was a miracle I didn't fail at all my scenes)
-First time at Disneyland in 5 years!
-First time I stayed at a Disneyland Hotel (and with a friend, no less!)
-First time on an extremely scary roller coaster that I swore to myself I'd never go on. (OK, so I sobbed the whole time and they had to pull me onto the ride...Tower of Terror is aptly named.)
-First time on a Cartoon Network show (Destroy Build Destroy...hopefully I'll be back for more :D)
-First time I got to go to a concert for my birthday (Sara Barellies, what up! Also, my first Sara Bareilles concert.)
-First time my parents allowed me to go camping..AGAIN! So, technically a second time...whatever, new place.
-First time to an actual, honest-to-god, could've-been-the-Parent-Trap, summer camp
-First time anyone's mistaken my brother as my bf (Let me tell you, I still have nightmares about it)
-First time I've ever been the topic of gossip in a boy cabin! It felt really violating and gross, yet flattering all at the same time. So weird.
-First time on a tightrope, 20 feet in the air. (Don't worry I was harnessed. It was actually extremely awesome!)
-First time I ever was roomies with my principal (and as result, became good friends with!)
-First time I got to my my godchild, Antonella!
-First time my mother's family got to go to Disneyland!
-First serious death (My grandpa <3)
-First time back in Dallas in the summer
-First time in a WHILE that I got to see a lot of my extended family in one place
-First time I've ever been one of the strongest people in the room emotionally.
-First time I got to see a lot of my old friends!
-First time I've got to hang outside Walmart for a while..
-First funeral I've attended in the US and with a friend
-First THIRD of July celebration haha
-First time I've celebrated 4th of July in a hotel
-First road trip with an almost full car (UGH.)
(Here's the part where I try to veer away from"firsts")
-Got to spend a lot of time with my extended family
-Got to go to "The Sing Off" taping and SING TO my idol, Sara Bareilles! I also broke the rules by getting up onstage :D
-First time I went to a midnight showing of Harry Potter dressed up as a character! Just in time for the last one...*tear*
-First friend to ever sleepover in my new house in Cali
-Finished recording two songs and most of a third one
-First time I actually stuck to and completed a diet!
-Met some important people
-My friends and I caught a pedophile in Disneyland! First time I've done that and been inside backstage Disney, inside security. Also, my first police interview! It was scary, yet awesome.
-Had to experience my favorite teacher be fired probably because of me...
-Got transferred to a new teacher and in a new center-just as I was making friends in my old one!
-First Mac notebook ever! I dreamed of this moment, in all it's 13" glory. (I know it's tiny, but whatever, shut up. Gosh.)
-Had a great Halloween with a friend and dressed as Kim Possible (Also the first time I've ever bared anything other than arms and legs for a costume)
-First time I cleaned the ENTIRE house mostly by myself (the things I do for love...geez haha)
-First time my parents allowed a male (and not just any male, but someone I liked, though of course this wasn't brought to their attention) to sleepover at our house. Not just for one night, but a WEEK. Miracles do happen, people.
-First time I got to relive movie moments: like go in a photo booth with a guy I like; roller skate with him; stroll down Christmasy-y, light filled streets with him; go on roller coasters with him; watch my favorite movie with him; get to ride piggyback on him; dancing with no music with him; sleeping in the car with him; getting matching temporary tattoos.
-First time I got to go to Disneyland with someone I really wanted to be there with
-First time I actually enjoyed exploring Pirate's Lair.
-First time I did the most dangerous things right in the dragon's lair...
-First time in a cap and gown...ever!
-First time in Disneyland on Halloween and on Christmas.
-I freaking graduated from high school! Huge freaking deal!
-Finished 136 episodes of How I Met Your Mother on Netflix. That was all that was available at the time. I have no life.
-Finally got some actual furniture in my room! After 2 years of sleeping on a mattress, this deserves to be on the list.
-Mom passed her big test an is now a registered Nurse Assistant! Congrats, mom!
-This will be on the last day of the year: I go to this Pirate's show to celebrate New Year's Eve. It's like Medieval Times, but with pirates! Awesome! Also, my baby, Whipped Cream, turns 4 on December 31st! Happy birthday, hun.

Uh...Hi, there!

So, recently there has been some activity going on here that has alerted me to the fact that more than one person (me) reads this blog. Like, honest to God reads it, not just skims for key words. That's kinda weird seeing as this is sorta like my second diary...except, you know, public. And probably forever if I don't delete it or the Internet somehow fails (God forbid). So, to anyone actually reading this: hello! I'm actually kinda normal in real life, have a respectable amount of Facebook friends, and spend a not-so respectable amount of time on Netflix. Nice to meet you, too. Have a fun time reading...I hope. :D

It is over.

I don't want to do this anymore. It's too complicated & difficult for something that doesn't even make me want to fight for it anymore. My heart's not in it and I don't see the point.

Renewed 17 Day Diet- Day 5

Breakfast started out with a banana and...a slice of pineapple upside down cake... But for lunch and dinner, I ate leftover ham and some salad! And ok, yes, some mashed potatoes. Oh, and this delicious bread with ham and cheese that my mom made yesterday! I couldn't help it, it was yummy! A small victory: I went to go see The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo with my brother and did not get any popcorn, nor any other concession stand food! How's that for self control? Baby steps, baby steps.

Today's weight: 119.0

Renewed 17 Day Diet- Day 6

I'm really big on routines when I'm on this diet, so I've tried to stick with the same stuff. Breakfast today: Oatmeal with some sugar. Mmm, sugar. I know that technically it's not "healthy" but, hey, it's oatmeal. Then I went to Ashley's Furniture Store for like 7 hours to find furniture. We got it, eventually, but still-7 hours! Afterwards, we went to a Dippin Dots store! Yes, store, not mall stand! They offered a lot of different flavors, a jumbo size, and Dippin Dots sundaes! It was awesome! I had a medium size with Mint Chocolate Chip and something called Moose Trappings. It was pretty much vanilla with chocolate bits. Then we had dinner. Oh yeah, dinner after dessert. I had a bowl of black bean soup. Seriously good. Also, a cheese crescent roll. It was delicious. To round it off, chamomile tea! That was it.

Today's weight: 120.1 lbs

15 Minutes of Truth

One of my favorite books is called Will Grayson, Will Grayson, written by John Green and David Levithan. It's hilarious, sad, and rings of truth. It deals with two very different boys with the same name who meet by chance circumstance. After that chance meeting, it changes them. One of the Wills likes this girl, Jane. He doesn't really come clean with her about his feelings until her ex-boyfriend comes into the picture. He has the idea to have 10 minutes of pure, unadulterated honesty. For 10 minutes, they both say the things they normally would never say to each other. They forget about political correctness or about hurting each others feelings. After the 10 minutes, they "go back" to their normal exchanges, but obviously the dynamic's changed.

When I read that, it kinda stuck with me. I propose that we all do that with each other at some point or another. Just sit down for 15 minutes and say everything that you couldn't say under normal circumstances. You'll be surprised at what comes out. A lot of it also has to do with being honest with yourself. Try having 15 minutes of truth with yourself. It's pretty interesting.

Renewed 17 Day Diet- Day 4

Yeah, I think I've thrown the diet out to the wind.

Breakfast: Oatmeal with sugar
Christmas dinner: Mashed potatoes and gravy; glazed ham; coleslaw salad; special bread; and the most delicious upside down pineapple cake.

Oh, and while I was furniture shopping with my dad and sister, the saleslady offered my a peanut butter cookie. I totally ate that down. FUCK THIS DIET.

 Today's Weight: 118.8 lbs

Renewed 17 Day Diet- Day 3

God, what is wrong with me?! Why is it so much harder to keep to my diet the second time around?! *sigh*

So, I started with a bowl of Quaker oatmeal with a spoonful of sugar (to help the medicine go down...oh yeah, Mary Poppins reference). Then I went to the mall with my mom and sister, only to find that the whole population of Orange County decided to flock there! Jesus christ, took us 20 minutes, 15 bad words, 10 exasperated sighs, and a partridge in a pear tree to get a freaking parking spot. BUT I did get a cute scarf, dress, and the BEST pair of shorts on sale! ...I love clothes so much. It's a problem. But, that meant that I went without food for at least 5 hours straight. So, we picked up my brother and headed to Pat & Oscar's, one of the best restaurants heads down! The problem is that almost everything on their menu is just carbs galore. We got a family meal, which included half a chicken (marinated in lemon-mmm mmm good), a cheese pizza, a large greek salad, tomato bisque soup, and a shitload of breadsticks. These breadsticks...take the ones from Olive Garden and make them 10 times better: BOOM! Pat & Oscar's breadsticks. How could I not take a bite?! Then I ate, not one, but TWO CHEESE PIZZA SLICES?! I literally had to wrestle my sister to get a slice! I know she was only trying to help me...but, dear god, there they were. Uneaten slices1 But I tried really hard not to! I had like 2 chicken drumsticks and a chicken breast, a cup of tomato bisque, and a LOT of salad! All of was amazing, but I couldn't resist!

Serves me right, though. Cuz I got a really bad stomach afterwards :D. So, HA on my weaker side! It deserved it.

Today's Weight: 120.5 lbs

Renewed 17 Day Diet- Day 2

I think my dad is a sadist. A sick sadist trying to torture me into fatness and lifelong self esteem issues. *sigh* I cheated. So, so epically today. Let's start from the beginning.

I got up at noon today, giving me just enough time to head down to the Apple store for a class (yeah, I like to learn things about my Mac, don't judge). That meant I had to skip breakfast until 2 pm, where "breakfast" turned to lunch. My dad bought Papa John's Pizza for my brother and sister while I was gone. I was hoping it would all be done by the time I got home. Unfortunately, my family decided that now they would be somewhat nice and leave at least 4 pieces for me. I say somewhat nice, because I only got one piece from my brother. It was an epic inner struggle between the noble, diet-sticking side vs. the evil, super hungry and weak side. Yeah, the weak side won. I had one slice of cold, Hawaiian pizza, which I hate. Like, come on, if I was gonna cheat, why couldn't it have been pepperoni? A few hours later, my mom made some delicious marinated grilled chicken with rosemary. I had a good portion of that. And then: the true torture began.
My dad, sister, and I went to Wal-Mart to buy some toys for homeless kids (very saintlike of us, blah blah blah). Everything was going alright until we went looking for raisins and came upon the chocolate aisle. My dear father came upon this one box of chocolates from Belgium in the shape of seashells and seahorses. What makes these chocolates special is that I've been looking for these chocolates for YEARS. Years. No exaggeration We had a box of them one time when I was really little and I've been searching for them ever since then. They are amazing.  And we found a box. While I was on my diet. FUCK MY LIFE. But I won out! I didn't get the box, nor the bag of white chocolate truffles that my dad kept saying he was going to buy. I almost burst into tears, begging him not to. He didn't, but it was hard to walk away. But I made it out of there without anything fattening! Little did I know that the trap would be sprung at my own house! My dad, it turns out, had a box of German chocolates of various delicious flavors that a friend from Sweden got him. I was kinda really stressed about some things...so I ate 3. Yup. *sigh* I think I'll cry myself to sleep tonight. Oh, and I had 2 handfuls of walnuts and some more chicken. OK, that's it.

Today's weight: 122.1 lbs

The Renewed 17 Day Diet! Day 1

So, I'm fat again. And that means: more torture! Yaaaaay!

I'm starting up my 17 Day Diet again, since it worked so well the first time. Really smart idea, right before Christmas and New Years. THE worst time for anyone on a diet. I'm super smart. And since I tell you everything, oh little Blogger o mine, I'm going to record everything that I eat here. Again. So, here we go. Day 1.

Day 1

I had to go to LA in the morning and I was in a hurry (big shock there), so I proceeded to leave the house without breakfast. My mother and I made it to LA with time to spare, so we decided to eat at Ihop! It was extremely torturous, staring at the menu full of Nutella crepes and mint chocolate pancakes. Goddamn you, Ihop. I decided on a Simply Fit 2 egg breakfast, with 2 strips of turkey bacon (which looked funny), fresh fruit, and whole wheat toast. I substituted the whole wheat toast for 2 sausage links. Mmm, sausage. For lunch, I was starving for some reason, so we went to Popeye's. I got a Louisiana Traveler's 5 piece chicken tenders. What I didn't know is that the fried skin around the chicken was actually full of carbohydrates. My mom decided to tell me that 3 pieces in. Awesome. Then we FINALLY got home (after 2 hours-yes TWO hours-of sitting traffic) and had some dinner. Lentil beans! They were pretty good, with a good dosing of lime juice. Hell yeah. That was pretty much it for food today.

Starting weight: 122.4 lbs

Long, Meaningful Talks Are Lame.

Don't you hate it when you have to have that long serious talk with someone? Like you know it's necessary for it to happen, but you don't want to seem like that person who LOVES long, meaningful talks. Especially if you're the girl, because then you are automatically placed in the "must talk about emotions and labels" category. And I think we can all agree that that is not a good category to be in. But I've learned that you really have to bite the bullet on these things and just do it. Sure, it sucks to communicate something difficult. But if years of reading girly magazines and watching cheesy rom coms have taught me anything, it's that communication is key. And how to kiss well, they've taught me that, too.

Hey, if you have to say something, say it. And if you keep waiting for the other person to say it, you'll just be two people sitting in silence.

Why Guys Have It Easy

Men: If you're ugly as shit or think you are, here's a tip - Be hilarious. I don't care if you are the nastiest motherfucker out there, if you can make a girl laugh (real laugh not fake) she will sleep with you. In a heart beat. Why? I don't know. But speaking as a female, I am just the same. Make me laugh constantly and I am yours!

Girls, unfortunately, don't have this luxury. I'm pretty sure Rosie O' Donnell and Oprah Winfrey are hilarious (at some point or another...), but you know they're always the one you "kill" while playing Screw, Marry, Kill. Guys SAY that they want a funny girl but if they're hideous? I'm sorry but you will never get laid. Or asked out. Because guys will take funny only to a certain extent.

Look at sitcoms and comedy! The big, fat funny guy somehow ends up with the jaw-droppingly hot chick. It's never the other way around! Why do you think Kevin James and Adam Sandler still have careers?! Because they bank on the funny (though, um, everything they've done of late is anything but funny).

So, guys. Take some stand up lessons. Girls: Hit the gym.

Yaaaaay double standards!

Cupcakes

Make you fat.

HAPPY NATIONAL CUPCAKE DAY

From me and GIR.

PS: He misses you, cupcake.

In reflection

I did it. I finally did it! I have surpassed a major milestone in my life. I have graduated high school.

See, it's funny how we think of milestones as life changers. At least, that's how it always seemed to me. Like, finally getting that puppy or learning to drive. By passing those milestones, it'd signify that you were "growing up" or changing for the better.

In fact, there's not just ONE moment that signifies that "You are now an adult. Enjoy." It kinda just...happens. Those milestones are just markers of time that's slipping away from you until one day you wake up in a nursing home, not being able to recognize yourself in the mirror. It's just depressing to me that I have now done the thing I've sorta dreamed of since I was little and I don't feel a thing except change and overwhelming nostalgia.

I've always been one to cling to past, at least a little. I like taking a break from life and looking at the past and seeing how much has changed. Now I can look back at diary entries from when I was 12 and realize I was a complete idiot. And 10 years from now I will look back at this blog and realize I was a complete drama queen. Life. You gotta love it.

But time moves on and people grow apart or come closer. You meet new people and lose some old ones and everything is just the same, just different. It's all the same patterns just in different circumstance. Milestones are met, you wonder how in the world you got this far, and you move on. Such is life. Great.

It's just crazy to think that in a few years I'll graduate college. Then get a job. And then get married. And then have a kid. And then have some more kids. Then retire. And then see those kids go to college. Then have grandkids. And then have my spouse die. Then I myself will die. Ok, probably not all in that order, but I think I just summed up everyone's life-more or less.

OR I could get into a fatal accident and die a year from now. *sigh*

I should have less free time to ponder and more time being blissful at Disneyland.